That Widow

Day 60 and he’s been gone for 2 months of forever.

I noticed today that no one gives a shit that he’s been gone for 2 months. Why would anyone care? He was MY person. I chose him every day. They were given him as a son and brother but I chose him. I think that’s a very big difference in feeling. I woke up every day choosing to be with him, choosing to work on the hard, choosing to love him despite it all. I would still, and do still, choose him.

No one called. No one text. No one checked in. No one said anything. It was just me with my heavy heart and restless soul seeking him out in any way that he can show himself to me these days. I tried to keep busy with my Peloton workout, my YouTube video workout, running errands, cleaning the floors, cooking dinner, football, a halftime blitzer workout, bedtime routine, and some bedtime yoga but still my heart is heavy and my soul is restless.

Day 60 and he’s been gone for 2 months of a forever sentence. I was going to post on social media and decided fuck them, they don’t get another piece of him that they don’t deserve.