Tag: time

• Day 33

  Day 33 and it’s been a little rough. Last night was by far the hardest night I’ve had since he died. I just could not get myself together. I stood in the shower sobbing and my 2nd and 3rd son were asking if I was sad. It was just a bad night. Tonight I’m working…

  That Widow

  September 16, 2022

  Uncategorized

  1 widow, 6 boys, alone, can’t breathe, crying, crying in the shower, first month, grief, hurts, just sad, lots of feelings, miss him, not supposed to be this way, realizations, suffering, thatwidow, time

• Day 32

  Day 32, ahhh college football season is upon us. Just another reminder he’s gone. Typically he would be working at the university for the game and doing special duty. He loved this season. He hated last year when he wasn’t able to work because of his cancer treatments and then preparing for his big surgery.…

  That Widow

  September 15, 2022

  Uncategorized

  1 widow, 6 boys, alone, crying, football, fuck off, grief, hurts, just sad, kids, lots of feelings, miss him, not supposed to be this way, pointless, same ending, suffering, thatwidow, time, why

• Day 30

  Day 30 and I have survived 1 month without him, 720 hours. My kids survived a month, 720 hours, without their dad. We survived, and I hate it. I hate that we have ever been put in this position to survive. Why did I start this blog? It’s a place for me to get my…

  That Widow

  September 13, 2022

  Uncategorized

  1 widow, 6 boys, affairs, first month, grief, hurts, kids, lots of feelings, not supposed to be this way, realizations, selfish, surviving, thatwidow, time, why

• Day 18

  Day 18 and I made it through the first few days of school. Granted the oldest was the only one to go for the 3 days it was still kind of a routine of getting up and getting our day started. I’m struggling with others being so flamboyant and attention seeking in their “grief”. While…

  That Widow

  September 1, 2022

  Uncategorized

  1 widow, 6 boys, David Bowie, grief, Iman, lots of feelings, selfish, thatwidow, time

• Day 16

  Day 16 was the first day of school for 3 of the 4 going this year and I just smiled through the tears. A mom walked up to me and asked if I was eating because I was looking real thin. I’m like yep, I’m also still breastfeeding, and chasing my 6 children alone now.…

  That Widow

  August 30, 2022

  Uncategorized

  1 widow, 6 boys, alone, banks, breastfeeding, hurts, just sad, kids, thatwidow, time, worth more alive than dead

• Day 9

  Today, day 9, was preschool open house for boys 3 and 4. It was also the night that I saw 2 of the women that my husband had an affair with. One of them being the one I banned from his viewing and funeral. It should never have been this way and I know he…

  That Widow

  August 23, 2022

  Uncategorized

  1 widow, 6 boys, affairs, birthday, open house, tarnished, thatwidow, time