Category: Uncategorized
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Day 30
Day 30 and I have survived 1 month without him, 720 hours. My kids survived a month, 720 hours, without their dad. We survived, and I hate it. I hate that we have ever been put in this position to survive. Why did I start this blog? It’s a place for me to get my…
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Day 29
Day 29 and I’m dreading tomorrow. But that’s tomorrow, right now it’s today. The oldest had his first football practice and there were a group of parents that were tailgating. I was astounded. I know my husband would have been losing his shit if he was there lol I’m finding that I’m questioning if I’m…
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Day 27
Day 27 and I got 3 of them to their football meet and greet on time and presentable. It was a win. I questioned today if I pushed him too hard? If I expected too much out of him? If I could have done something different? If I could have pushed to have him seen…
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Day 26
Day 26 and as I folded laundry I realized a lot of others things died, not just my husband. His clothes will never be washed and folded by me again, unless one of the boys decided to wear something. I’ll never have another biological baby, it’s always been on my heart to foster/adopt but who…
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Day 25
Day 25, the house that built me. The song reminds me of him because while he wasn’t a house he did build me from where I was when we met over 12 years ago into who I am now. I also found the original fire stick remote that we had been searching for and ended…
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Day 24
Day 24 and I was asked what I was doing with my husband’s car because another family member would like to have it if I wasn’t doing anything with it. This hurt. This hurt a lot. Why ask? I already told everyone that the car was paid off and my husband wanted it to go…
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Day 23
It’s day 23 and I got a “portfolio”. I’m 35 and I have a “portfolio” and a money manager. My husband had a beautiful mind that was OCD on the best of days. His way of categorizing and delegating are not for the faint of heart. He’s type A to the extreme where I’m over…
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Day 22
Day 22, you never realize you’re doing something for the last time until after it’s the last time. I was thinking of the last time that I saw his eyes, when he was really looking at me. The last time we slept in our bed together. The last time we gave the kids baths together.…
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Day 21
Day 21, 3 weeks, 504 hours without him. Today I made it through the first procedure for boy #3 all by myself. Not a huge procedure, an ABR, but still the first without him. The bank that holds our mortgage officially contacted me about taking the loan over in my name. The deed has us…
That Widow 