Tag: miss him
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Day 60
Day 60 and he’s been gone for 2 months of forever. I noticed today that no one gives a shit that he’s been gone for 2 months. Why would anyone care? He was MY person. I chose him every day. They were given him as a son and brother but I chose him. I think…
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Day 55
Day 55 and it’s been 8 weeks, 56 days, 1344 hours without him. It hasn’t gotten easier. I keep repeating that it has to get easier it has to…so far it hasn’t. It’s not hard taking care of the boys, mentally exhausting? Yes, but not hard. It’s hard being without him. It’s hard knowing that…
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Day 51
Day 51 and welcome to my Ted talk on trauma and being the best friend I can be. My best friend got divorced last week and her ex husband is on vacation this week with a new girl and they’re wearing wedding bands. She’s crushed and automatically starts on the “what is wrong with me”…
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Day 48
Day 48 and it’s been 1,176 hours without you, without my partner, without the father to my babies. Today it feels like you’ve been gone forever but I’m still stuck in the same grief. I look at our kids and what they’re doing and I’m so sad that he’s missing everything. I know he’s still…
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Day 47
Day 47 and it was full of football. All 3 older boys played at the same time…again. That makes at least 4 out of the 5 games they will do that. Ugh! So hard when it’s just me and he can’t be at one while I’m at the other and then switch. We just make…
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Day 46
Day 46 and 4 out of the 6 kids have colds. I knew it was coming last night when they started with the interrupted sleep patterns and then they didn’t get out of bed u til late. I knew it was coming I just didn’t want it to. I got his thumbprint necklace that I…
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Day 42
Day 42 and I just want to lay in our closet and not get up. I finally put away his clothes that had been sitting in the chair by our closet. I had folded them and brought them up to our room but I refused to put them away for him. I intentionally did it…
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Day 41
Day 41 it’s been 6 weeks, 1008 hours, that he’s been gone. It feels like a lifetime already that he’s been gone. I heard the Foo Fighters song Everlong and just the opening of “hello, I’ve waited here for you, everlong”, I imagine my husband saying this to me when we finally get together again.…
That Widow 